Thursday, June 20, 2013

Just Say Yes.



 I briefly mentioned in this post an inner battle that rages on inside me.
Basically, I shared that I'm a prisoner to my own pain and that pain left me with fear.
with anxiety.
with hurt.

I wrote, "I was holding to my pain, and I had all of this negativity within me. It was holding me back. In fact, it was stopping me from developing friendships and relationships. It was preventing me from truly moving forward with my life because I was still stuck in the past."

I was afraid. terrified. 
I never wanted to feel vulnerable again.
I never did anything out of my comfort zone.

In fact, I vowed to never put myself in those positions again. 

I was living in fear. 


Finally, I just got sick and tired of constantly saying no to things that scared me. I was sick of over thinking every little detail and overanalyzing everything, weighing every option. 
 I just realized life is too short to keep living like this! I was sick and tired of living half a life. 

Carpe Diem, right!?!? 

So, I came up with this idea of sorts.
What if every time I was tempted to say no to something, I'd say Yes. 
Not just small things, but big things too. 
What's the worst that could happen?
Would I shrivel up and die? Or would I finally be living my life to it's fullest potential?

So the time came when I was asked to spend a few months in Florida.
I thought of a billion reasons why I shouldn't do it. 

but I said yes anyways. 

I was registering for fall classes and was terrified at the only options I had. I wanted to throw in the towel and forget the past two years of college all together. 

But I said yes, and registered for that class. 

I was begged to ride this ride, that quite frankly looked terrifying,
but I said yes. 
(and enjoyed it so much I rode it again!)


and gulp, this was the tough one...

I was asked to meet a guy who might be interested in me.
and you know what?

I said yes. 



Part of truly forgiving someone, I've learned, is also learning to forgive yourself. 
It's about allowing yourself to feel vulnerable again. 
So, if you feel like your constantly being held back because of fear, anxiety, or pain
I'd encourage you to just. say. yes.

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